So I've finally admitted to myself and to others that I think I am more attractive online, more specifically Snapchat. I'm very sure that it's because I take good pictures of myself. Because honestly, when other people put me online I feel so horribly unattractive and it scares me. I feel as though I'm a completely different person. I'm always plagued with fear that people will think less of me when they meet with me in person. I love to interact in darkness, or out of the public eye... I'm not sure how to fix it. I know that I need to fix it soon or I will never move forward through life and love it. I don't want to die unhappy with myself and the way that I have lived my life. I want life to mean something to me. I think that focusing on what goes on inside of my head will help me to fulfill the purpose that I've been looking for. So here we go! 😊
I've never met a man bold enough to ask me that. Most will just say it casually, "I'm ugly af but I'll treat you right" or some other stupid shit. Why? Because they want you to say "You're not ugly bae". Bullshit ass validation that they probably seek from every person they come into contact with. And I'm making it a general "they" instead of saying "he" because women do the same shit. I think most times that woman complain about men is because they are upset that men are capable of going through some of the same frustrating experiences as them, and it's definitely vice versa. People are very fucked up. For some reason I keep finding myself struggling to figure out if I'm a fucked up person or not. It's something that I think about a lot... but back on track. Today, well yesterday (it's 1:30 in the morning right now), I had barely even said hello to N's cousin before convincing myself that he was...
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I may not even read these but shoot.