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It Feels Like I Only Go Backwards

I feel like the pieces are clicking together much better than they normally do.  And I know that it's because I hit the weed and I've been taking care of Jaxson.  My problem lies in the fact that I don't have the ability to enjoy this comfort.  I have to work in order to survive.  Everything I need to be successful costs money.  It then becomes a sacrifice.  Work hard for money in order to sustain life but I give up mental and physical health.  It's not a good trade off.  But I'm really not sure what else I could do.  If life was simple, I could live at home with my parents until I could get it together.  Unfortunately, I was not dealt a very good hand when it comes to family.  I have to play with the cards that I'm given and sometimes it's extremely hard.  It always seems unfair.  And yes, there are people with worse circumstances out there but that doesn't make my pain any less.

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